how to have a successful mindset

Creative Mindset

Apr 29

Female business owner celebrating her success at her desk. Her Messy Bun Podcast - How to create a successful mindset and use the law of attraction.

How to use The Law of Attraction to change how we see success

If you’re trying be successful but aren’t in the right headspace or don’t have the right tools, it could feel overwhelming. Listen to Season 1 Episode 04 of Her Messy Bun Podcast to learn my tricks for creating a positive mindset, and how you can stop letting peoples words affect you, and a mini lesson in getting the life you want through the Law of Attraction or keep reading.

Create a Successful Mindset with The Law of Attraction

*Disclosure: I only recommend products I would use myself and all opinions expressed here are our own. This post may contain affiliate links that at no additional cost to you, I may earn a small commission.

It is extremely important to create a successful mindset in order to create a successful life. It sounds pretty self-explanatory or like common sense, but many of us don’t fully know what a successful mindset really looks like.

I believe there are multiple components to this, but first you have to define what success looks like to you. Is it a big house, a fancy car, a healthy family, a flourishing career… whatever it is to you, you need to be as specific if you can be. In order to really break this down, I’m about to draw the blinds on my life and goals and share details with you, in hopes that you benefit and feel confident to start your own process.

What success looks like to me in no specific order:

healthy + strong family
a clean + well designed home
a positive + happy life
Raising a genuinely happy family
artistically creative
selling my art
Having a business that pays all of my bills
Being able to save at $50,000 a year.
Growing a garden that allows us to live off our own land
Paying down my student loans
Creating an influential space to teach and help others grow and be happy
Being able to live off of passive income
Growing the business where I can financially afford to hire a small creative team
Out growing my at home office and studio space
Getting paid sponsorships with brands I believe in
Being able to take vacations wherever and whenever we want
Experiencing different cultures
Sell online courses sharing
Having a highly popular brand that generates consistent sales and traffic to my podcast.

Ok, I feel like I’ve reached a point of overlapping. A lot of what I just spewed off is a pipe dream, but it’s important to list things that you associate with success even if it seems unrealistic for you to reach. You need to be able to have a clear list of what you want to achieve in order to be able to get there. Now that I have my list, I’m going to find a place to put it so that I can be reminded of it daily. I like to keep my list in a spot that I will see everyday without faulter. Before we moved and I had multiple work zones like the dining room, our bedroom and part of Blake's office, I would keep my list in the bathroom. Now I keep mine in my studio.

Being able to see what you want to achieve is the first way to consistently train your brain into believing it’s possible. You can even take it a step further and create a dream board. This can be as creative as you want, or as minimal as you want. Re-creating that list in another format is embedding it farther in your brain. It’s teaching your mind that these things are important enough to take time out of your already busy day and put more focus on this list. Triggering your brain to start recognizing the importance of the items on this list. Part of the reason I decided to share todays episode was because my dream board got ruined in the move so now I have to create another one. This might take time, for some it can be as simple as making pinterest board or gluing images to a piece of paper. For me, I struggle because I like everything that I do to look like art and have purpose.

So if you want yours to be a little more creative, lets build ours together! I’m going to find a collect of magazine cut outs, photo inspiration off of pinterest, I’m going to grab some paint, and I’m going to use my wire wall hanger to display it. These can be very personal, so if you don’t want to share them, I completely understand but if you do be sure to tag me in it!

After your list is built and your dream board is created, the next step is to actually read your list out loud. You can do this daily, weekly or whenever you look at your dream board, but get it into your routine to speak out loud what success is to you. The more you integrate this list into your daily active thoughts, the more these thoughts will become real. Which is where the Law of Attraction really comes into play, but I’ll get to that later.

Now that you have your list and the tools to go with it, my next step to a successful mindset, is to rid yourself of negative, competitive, and comparative thoughts, actions and people. You want to surround yourself with people who are positive, people who want you to succeed and who don’t waste their time trying to one-up you but can rather be happy for you and rise with you.

Being trapped in that comparative and competitive mindset is not healthy for any aspect of your life. Sometimes we think people are being supportive when they try to relate your situation with theirs, but are they? Take a step back, notice who makes you feel judged, who makes you feel like they are always competing with you, or trying to one up you. Now think about the people who are always supporting you with positive advice, or try to understand your situation. Are they actually listening to what you have to say, or just focusing on the next thing they want to say? Take a minute to understand the difference, and then try to interpret how each scenario makes you feel. Sometimes we find ourselves surrounding ourselves with people who put us in that negative train of thought, whether its accidental or on purpose. By being aware of the people who do this to us, we are putting ourselves ahead of the "game" and can prepare to not allow these actions affect us.

I watched this interview with Vanessa Van Edwards a few years ago on youtube. She talks about toxic people and ambivalent friendships in your life and how there are different levels to someone's ability to bring us down. She talked about the very obvious toxic people, and how we’ve grown to recognize them, but then she mentioned ambivalent friendships. These are people that fly under the radar. Kind of like I mentioned earlier. They’re the people that always leave you questioning if you’re actually going to have fun with them. These are the “frienemies” in our lives. Long story short, she breaks it down that the ambivalent friendships can be even more dangerous to our minds because they cause us to use more mental energy, where as toxic people are capable of creating boundaries to keep them at bay. The easiest way to tell if you have someone like this in your life she says is to ask yourself this, “Are you ever doubting that they’re really happy for you?”.

The goal here is to create a positive mindset, so if you are surrounding yourself with people that make you feel bad, you’re constantly going to be fighting off negative thoughts or giving part of your daily mental energy that could be used elsewhere.

Another thing to keep in mind about negative thoughts is that they come in different forms. There’s the obvious examples - I suck at this and No one likes me. In these examples you can clearly see the negative tone. Then there's the not so obvious which sounds like, I’m not going to let myself get distracted today or I won’t forget. These are sneaky negative thoughts that keep us down, but that can easily be switched into positives which sound more like - I’m focused and ready and I will remember. This switch of how you phrase your sentences is extremely important for a successful mindset. So take a look on what you are thinking when you are trying to advance in projects, work or life in general. Find your pattern phrases you tell yourself and see if you can adjust them to make them a fully positive sentence.

Finally, you have to truly feel successful and positive. I want to explain why feeling is the most important aspect of everything, but in order to do so I need to talk now about the Law of Attraction. I’m only going to brief it, because it’s extremely simple at the core but it’s one of those topics that you can get lost in and talk for hours about.

If you haven’t already, you need to go watch and read The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. When I first started my self-employed journey I watched this documentary on netflix and it forever changed my way of thinking. The Secret talks about the Law of Attraction and how it relates to the universe and then teaches you how to use it to manifest your dream life.

For those of you who don’t know the Law Of Attraction states that like attracts like. As go through school, we learn about all the different laws, Newton's Laws of Motion, you know..what goes up must come down. Well we also learn about the Law of Vibration which states that everything in this world is in motion. There are different levels or speeds of vibrations. Not only are objects vibrating, but mankind is also vibrating, and we’re vibrating at a different frequency. Emotions can change that frequency. When you’re at the top of your game and having an amazing day, you’re vibrating at a high frequency allowing you expand and grow. When you’re sad or angry you’re vibrating at low frequency making you contract, causing you to burrow and feel down.

You know when you’re hanging out with your friend and you can’t stop laughing and you guys are both having a good time and just keep bouncing off of each other's energy, and you can’t get enough of each other, you two are vibrating at similar frequencies.

Then there’s people that you hang out with and you feel like they’re bringing you down, or you just can’t put your finger on it, but it feels off. It’s because you two are vibrating at different frequencies, you literally aren’t vibing with each other.

Based on the Law of Attraction, what level of frequency you are on you attract. There’s a scale of vibrations from high to low and everything in between, when you’re on a high you’re on the expansion incline but when you’re on a low, you’re on a contraction.

So for those of you interested high to low I’m going to list out some of the basic levels and it helps if you picture a triangle with the tip downwards.

Enlightenment
Peace
Joy
Love
Reason
Acceptance
Willingness
Neutrality
Courage
Pride
Anger
Desire
Fear
Grief
Apathy
Guilt
Shame

You can also look up the emotional vibration analysis chart on pinterest to find a visual.

The law of attraction is really simple, in order to get what you want you have to raise your vibration. Think about this way, thoughts become things. Whatever you’re thinking you are creating a frequency for.

Have you ever noticed when you are sad, angry or upset you tend to stay sad angry or upset. More bad things start to happen, and you don’t understand why it's happening to you. It’s because you are attracting more bad things by focusing on it. Have you also noticed that when you are happy and living the life more positive things keep happening to you?

Like anything, you can practice the Law of Attraction. The most common and successful practice is visualizing what you want, however if you noticed the analysis chart I mentioned is based on your emotions. So aside from visualizing you have to feel like it’s already yours. This feeling needs to be as positive as you can get because as we know in the emotional vibration analysis chart, the most positive feelings are the highest frequencies.

In The Secret, they break down a simple three step process to use the Law of Attraction to manifest what you want in life. They say first you ask, next you believe, and then you receive. When I first heard this I thought it was just another silly guru thing that definitely wouldn’t work for me, but as the documentary went on, I started realizing just how much this made sense. Especially when you understand that the law of attraction isn’t biased to wants and don’t wants, because as I explained earlier, a don’t is a negative term which brings negativity to your life.

OK! So back to the successful mindset. Earlier I made a list of what success looks like - I’m clear and precise, I phrased it like it was mine, and I read it out loud. This is me asking for what I want. Now I put that list in eye sight and I’m making a mood board, so I see exactly what I’m asking for. I personally am going to take it a step further and close my eyes and visualize like I already have it. This is me believing it’s mine. All that’s left is for me to receive it. When you can understand the a successful mindset goes hand in hand with the Law of Attraction, you have the tools at your fingertips.

This is the hard part for some people, it is not just going to happen over night. It’s not something that you can control like that, it’s the practice of the Law of Attraction. By practicing rising your vibration, you’re opening yourself up to reaching the same frequencies as these objects that you want to obtain.

I’m going to give you one example of when I started noticing the Law of Attraction working for me. When I first started working for myself, I always found myself saying “if only I had an extra $100 for this..” or “if i had an extra $100 I’d do that..” 2 months later, Blake and I went bar hopping with his brother and now wife and we were having a blast! We were laughing, and totally enjoying ourselves. Our happiness and love for eachother raised our frequency. At the end of the night as we were walking to the car (Blake was our DD), my brother-in-law said and I quote, “if only I had an extra $100 I would say lets do another round of shots” and without hesitation, I looked down and picked up what looked like a folded $1 bill, and without a doubt in my mind lifted it up and said “like this one?” Everyone was shocked, including myself.

I knew in that moment that I had made that happen. There was no coincidence that the only visualization that I had been practicing to start off my manifesting journey was that phrase “if I had an extra $100” so when my brother-in-law said that same exact line I had been trying to visualize everyday for 2 months, I knew it was the universe working with me. I had finally gotten on that same frequency and got what I had been picturing.

The really cool part about recognizing when you’ve made something happen is that you know it’s possible so you can keep it going, but never forget it’s a practice. Which means you have to keep practicing in order for it to work on those big things you want in life.

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