How To Overcome Imposter Syndrome
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Are you constantly doubting your abilities?
That’s called imposter syndrome - listen to Season 2 Episode 16 of Her Messy Bun Podcast to learn how to overcome your chronic imposter syndrome or keep reading.
How To Overcome Chronic Imposter Syndrome
If you have a chronic case of imposter syndrome, this is the episode for you. We outline what imposter syndrome is, why you're feeling it, and how it's holding you back in life and business. And most importantly, we share how to manage the feeling and take steps to get rid of it.
What is imposter syndrome?
By definition it’s: the persistent inability to believe that one's success is deserved or has been legitimately achieved as a result of one's own efforts or skills.
Doubting your abilities and feeling like a fraud. It disproportionately affects high-achieving people, who find it difficult to accept their accomplishments. Many question whether they're deserving of accolades.
Brene Brown says that it’s based in perfectionism:
“Perfectionism is not the same thing has striving to be your best. Perfectionism is the belief that if we live perfect, look perfect, and act perfect, we can minimize or avoid the pain of blame, judgement, and shame. It’s a shield. It’s a twenty-ton shield that we lug around thinking it will protect us when, in fact, it’s the thing that’s really preventing us from flight.”
Mastin Kipp agrees when he says - Perfectionism a dream killer because it's just fear disguised as trying to do your best.
Don’t let imposter syndrome stop you:
The feeling of imposter syndrome is not a reason not to do something. Personally, it's my indicator to actually DO that thing — growth comes from uncomfortable situations.
Ask when your imposter syndrome shows up? What are the patterns? Is it coming from a place of perfectionism, fear of failure, fear of looking stupid? That's when you need to reaffirm all the things you know for sure
Your self-worth doesn't depend on your outcomes
Everyone starts out being really bad at the thing they're eventually good at
If you don't try, you'll never get to where you want to go
Nobody is actually paying attention to you
The remedy is usually confidence in that thing — and you can't gain confidence without starting, trying, failing, trying again, and eventually landing in a groove
DOING is the answer — take messy action
"Don't think you deserve the job? Apply for it anyway. Don't think your video is good enough? Post it anyway. Don't think they'll reply to your email? Send it anyway. DO NOT SELF-REJECT."
Why Danielle doesn’t feel imposter syndrome
I used to feel like imposter when I was in school for graphic design and marketing. It was mostly because of the fact that I wasn’t given the tools I needed in order to succeed. They always put in classes I didn’t have the pre-recs for - so I always felt out of place and insecure.
It wasn’t until my final year of college when everything was finally aligned, and I FINALLY had the tools and knowledge I needed to feel confident in my classes. I was always over-worked and burnt out from having to play catch up to understand something that I should have taken an entire course on already.
I very distinctly remember my teachers that last year being ✨shocked✨ at how talented I was, because up until that point they had only seen my burnt out, imposter filled work.
Thats when I decided to never feel like an imposter EVER AGAIN! Here are the things I do to help me stay far away from that toxic self-imposed feeling:
If I say I want to do something, I do it. If I don’t have to the knowledge or tools to do it, I research how and practice it.
Morning pages saved my life. This practice of brain dumping my conscious stream of thought and being able to process my thoughts more clearly - stops imposter syndrome in it’s tracks.
Finally, I do a quarter Evidence List. I coined this term with my clients a few years back. Your Evidence List is the list you create for yourself about yourself. Everything you’ve ever done. Pretty much its the evidence of your past-self to show your future-self that you are in fact capable of achieving anything you want.
"People romanticize the plans but dread the execution, and the magic that you're looking for is in the work that you're avoiding." - unknown
More Resources
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And As Always – Don’t Give Up, Take A Day Off Instead.
Until next time!
xo Danielle
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Danielle’s TikTok: @her.messy.bun
